The Ultimate Halloween Adventure

Halloween Half-Pagers: The Innsmouth Shuffle

Halloween Half-Pagers The Innsmouth Shuffle

My band “Billy’s Guitar” have been playing for five years, and we’ve traveled across half the continent until we came across that strange fishing town called Innsmouth. They had a small stage at a place called Dagon’s hall and they let us set up for an impromptu concert. When the townspeople came to hear us play, my band mates and I were shocked by how degenerate they all looked. I mean just because fishing was their livelihood didn’t mean they had to actually look like fish! Feeling that the crowd might be a tough one, staring at us with their big fishy eyes, we decided to play some local tunes and that perked them up. I almost stopped my song in shock at the horrible sight when those fish heads started to dance. Well if you can call it that. It was more a foot dragging and hopping, a truly horrible sight. Next came the song requests, they wanted to hear some weird stuff I never heard of before. Songs such as “The Call of Cthulhu” and the “Dhol Chants.” When we professed ignorance of them, the town’s people gave us some nasty looks. Someone even mentioned something about bringing up a shoggoth to clean up out act. Things were really starting to feel uncomfortable so my band and I exited stage left and ran from the town. Luckily the fish heads’ running was even worse than their dancing and we made it out of the town alive, minus our instruments. After that we refused to play in fishing towns and I made a new song based on the experience. It’s called “The Innsmouth Shuffle.”

….John Kohlbrenner……