The Ultimate Halloween Adventure

Halloween Half-Pagers: The Lunch Bag

Halloween Half-Pagers The Lunch Bag

It was a crazy day at the office, so I had a late lunch. After eating at a local restaurant, I was a little surprised to find a crumpled brown paper lunch bag sitting on my desk. I didn’t bring any food, so it must have been someone else’s. Quickly asking my co-workers, I learned that none of them had brought the lunch bag. Confused, as I approached the bag to look inside it started to move. I jumped back, shocked. Then I watched as the bag rattled as if something alive was inside it. Thinking it could be a rat inside eating someone’s lunch, I grabbed my stapler to club it and slowly approached the bag.

Just as I was about to smash it, the bag spoke to me. “Stop!”

I was stunned, the voice hadn’t come from within the bag, the bag itself had spoken. The opening at the top had moved as if they were lips.

“How is it possible?” I gasped.

The top of the lunch bag moved again and formed a smile. “I’m all your mental baggage. I’m here to remind you of all your worries.” The bag then went through a laundry list of all my problems. My head reeled, was I losing my mind? Then it was my turn to smile. I had an answer to my problem. I did what anyone would do with a used paper bag, I threw it in the garbage. I felt much better after that, tossing out all my worries. It was much cheaper than paying for a shrink.

….John Kohlbrenner……