The Ultimate Halloween Adventure

One Dark Halloween Night Paperback Trailer!

One Dark Halloween Night Now Available in Paperback!

Hello my fellow Halloween friends, after two long years, my book is finally here. Please check it out over at Amazon: One Dark Halloween Night

 

Halloween Half-Pagers: Earth out of Time

Halloween Half-Pagers Earth out of Time

I, Nirziizz a Yithian of the ninth degree report the final success and the failure of our people. The mental transference to the Colepterous race in the far future has been a success. The beetle- like bodies, while not as versatile as our previous ancient forms, do retain the mental capacity to suit us well. We have escaped the plague of our predators those polyporous fiends from below, but now we face a new dilemma. Earth has been destroyed.

Our forward casters had chosen wrongly, the safety of the future on this planet is no more. I had argued that we should have transferred our minds to the far purple planet in the distant Ulxxvyee Galaxy, with its worm like inhabitance. The council disagreed, fearful of the overextending of our mental energy. Now it is too late for us! Our most ancient and feared prophecies have come to pass. The Great Old Ones; nightmare spawned interdimensional cancer, have found their way into this reality and are now pillaging all existence. This once green verdant planet is now dead, I told them to pick the purple one.

….John Kohlbrenner……

Grimmgraves’s Gallery: Giant Japanese Robot Toys

Grimmgraves's Gallery Giant Japanese Robot Toys

King Joe: “Watch where you’re walking everybody, we got little people down there.”

Halloween Half-Pagers: Cthulhu still Calling

Halloween Half-Pagers Cthulhu still Calling

When the end of the world happened, it started with a massive headache. My brain pounded with images of a great octopus- headed creature deep in the ocean residing inside a huge crypt in the middle of an alien city talking in its sleep. What the monster said, I had no idea, just some weird chant over and over. Then at 5am east coast time, Cthulhu opened its eyes and my mind exploded in pain. Half the world went insane and the rest had a massive hangover. As countries went rampant with chaos, news outlets started reporting a massive creature approaching the California coast. On the TV I saw the monster of my visions, massive and slimy green, it strolled through the US military’s attempt to stop it as if they were not even there.

As the monstrosity moved across the continent more and more people lost their minds, the army and air force used all their weapons against it to no affect. Then when Cthulhu reached the east coast, it stopped at a small town called Dunwich, the place where I lived. Hiding in the woods nearby, I watched Cthulhu start its chant again while standing before a hill full of mysterious stones that everyone thought was haunted. It wasn’t long before it was answered. The sky tore open and nightmares poured out, Cthulhu, high priest of the Great Old Ones had called Yog-Sothoth to open the way and now the elder gods were here. Why  was I there and knew what was happening? I remembered that my mom always claimed that we were descendants of the horror fiction writer, H.P. Lovecraft. This all made sense as I giggled madly. He wasn’t a fiction writer and I was his witness to prove his stories were true. When the world went dark the headaches finally ended.

….John Kohlbrenner……

Grimmgraves’s Gallery: Soul of Chogokin Shogun Warriors

Grimmgraves's Gallery  Soul of Chogokin Shogun Warriors

Raydeen: “Guys.., I think we are too big to fit in those spaceships.”

Grimmgraves’s Gallery ScareLA 2016

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Halloween Half-Pagers: The Innsmouth Shuffle

Halloween Half-Pagers The Innsmouth Shuffle

My band “Billy’s Guitar” have been playing for five years, and we’ve traveled across half the continent until we came across that strange fishing town called Innsmouth. They had a small stage at a place called Dagon’s hall and they let us set up for an impromptu concert. When the townspeople came to hear us play, my band mates and I were shocked by how degenerate they all looked. I mean just because fishing was their livelihood didn’t mean they had to actually look like fish! Feeling that the crowd might be a tough one, staring at us with their big fishy eyes, we decided to play some local tunes and that perked them up. I almost stopped my song in shock at the horrible sight when those fish heads started to dance. Well if you can call it that. It was more a foot dragging and hopping, a truly horrible sight. Next came the song requests, they wanted to hear some weird stuff I never heard of before. Songs such as “The Call of Cthulhu” and the “Dhol Chants.” When we professed ignorance of them, the town’s people gave us some nasty looks. Someone even mentioned something about bringing up a shoggoth to clean up out act. Things were really starting to feel uncomfortable so my band and I exited stage left and ran from the town. Luckily the fish heads’ running was even worse than their dancing and we made it out of the town alive, minus our instruments. After that we refused to play in fishing towns and I made a new song based on the experience. It’s called “The Innsmouth Shuffle.”

….John Kohlbrenner……

Grimmgraves’s Gallery: Fantasy Action Figures 2

Grimmgraves's Gallery Fantasy Action Figures 2

Sauron Says: “It’s good to be bad!”

Halloween Half-Pagers The Other Whateley

Halloween Half-Pagers The Other Whateley

What most people didn’t know was that Wilbur Whateley had another brother. Not the invisible, tentacle, monstrosity that favored  their father, but a third brother that was more human like his mother. Almost in every way, the child looked human except for a single green tentacle that came out of his forehead. Elder Whateley, the baby’s grandfather didn’t like it, there was no hiding the tentacle and it would expose the dark plot of bringing the children’s father to earth, so the baby was brought to an orphanage.

Growing up Billy Bob Whateley never even came close to being adopted. The tentacle on the forehead was a real deal killer, so he grew into a lonely bitter man. When he finally came of age, he then moved to Hollywood and became an actor. He stared in such sci-fi and horror classics as The Tenticled Terror and Have Tentacle Will Travel. Later in life when he was in his sixties, his acting was so fondly remembered that they gave him a star on Hollywood Boulevard. He often read his brother’s journals which told how his father could be summoned when the stars were right, well he had his own star now. It would be a perfect place to open a gate for his dear old dad – Yog-Sothoth.

….John Kohlbrenner……

 

 

Grimmgraves’s Gallery: Fantasy Action Figures

Grimmgraves's Gallery Fantasy Action Figures

The Devil: “Come on guys lets stomp some superheroes!”

Halloween Half-Pagers: Skiing the Mountains of Madness

Halloween Half-Pagers Skiing the Mountains of Madness

I was always into extreme sports, but when Billy invited me to go skiing in Antarctica, I thought he was out of his mind. The trip instead ended up being out of this world. He had booked it with Miskatonic Travel Group and before we knew it, we arrived in Antarctica during the summer season. Taking a helicopter, we left the ice breaker and flew south. Then after an hour of flying over endless white snow plains, we saw the mountains. They were huge! Biggest mountains I had ever seen and my mouth watered at the thought of skiing down them. As we came closer, we noticed weird structures built into the mountains. Towers and cave openings covered the upper parts and I looked at my friend mystified, but he just shrugged. Finally, we reached a particularly sinister looking mountain which Billy had told me would be pure madness to go down.

Leaping out of the helicopter wearing our skis, we slid down the incline of the mountain. All around us those strange ancient towers looked alien up close. Then as we approached the creepy cave openings, skiing past them I couldn’t help feeling that we were being watched. Spying a large one ahead of us, a nightmare suddenly erupted from it. It was huge, black and shapeless, full of tentacles, green eyes and gaping mouths. As we raced by it, the monstrosity reached out and grabbed at us with one of its black tentacles. It let out a horrid cry as we passed, avoiding its grasp. Then things really got weird. All around us the mountain began to flux and change, becoming landscapes of various worlds. Nightmarish places full of hideous monster gods and inhuman creatures. Eventually we made it down and were back in Antarctica.

My buddy looked at me insanely and said, “I told you that mountain was pure madness!”

I madly agreed with him. Soon our next trip was to be an asylum.

….John Kohlbrenner……